When Morehouse Became the WHITE House

Thanks for sharing, Dwayne.

Morehouse is an institution that is recognized for its longstanding tradition of educating young Black men.  It is one of the nation’s premier HBCU (Historically Black Colleges and Universities. 

However, a unique situation at Morehouse this year provides an opportunity for discussion.

For the first time in the school’s 141 year history…the valedictorian is White.  (see article)

Joshua Packwood, from the Kansas City area, is graduating from Morehouse with a 4.0 GPA in Economics.  According to the article, Packwood is familiar with being in the minority.  He was one of a few white students in his high school class.  Also, some of his siblings are “mixed” because his mother was married to a Black man.

Do you see any issues with White students attending predominant Black schools? 

 

She Brings Home the Bacon

I saw an article today and thought about all the working mothers. The article discussed “having the pressures of the workplace piled on top of the demands of parenthood – and that’s not an easy act to balance.”

CareerBuilder.com did an annual Mother’s Day survey and found the following:

43% of working moms are willing to take a pay cut if it allows them to spend more time with their children.

51% of moms who live in households with more than one income would leave their job if their family could live off of their spouse’s or significant other’s income.

The article went on to provide some tips on how to ease the pressure of being a working mom:

1. Incorporate telecommuting into your workday. Many companies allow their employees to work from home one or more days per week, which is an easy way for you to spend more time in the morning and afternoon with your children rather than in standstill traffic. Check with your human resources department and employee manual to see if telecommuting is an option. Of course, to telecommute you should be self-disciplined and able to get your work done even though the boss isn’t leaning over your shoulder.

2. Use one calendar for all appointments. If you have a conference scheduled for Monday morning, you’re not going to be late to work. If your daughter has a soccer game Wednesday night, will you have the same determination to be there on time? Putting all of your appointments – whether they involve the office or the family – on one calendar makes it easier to avoid schedule conflicts and missing personal appointments. You’ll also be able to notice if you’re spending more time on work than on family with a quick glance at the calendar.

3. Make your family a priority. Although your family is the most important thing in your life, you might forget to show it. Devote your weekends and any free weekday evenings to family activities. Even if you can’t plan a mid-week activity, make a quick phone call to your children to see how their school day went.

4.  Take it easy. Work can become so hectic that you forget that you actually do like your job and the people around you. Leave some free time to relax and regroup between meetings so you don’t stay in a constant state of stress. You’ll be able to appreciate what you do and whom you work with. Also, keep evenings and weekends free of projects so you can rest and be completely recharged when you head back to the office.

5. Let others do their share. Make sure you’re letting the people around you take on some responsibility. You might be tempted to do everything yourself, but you’ll only stress yourself out. If you’re a manager, delegating responsibility will ease your workload and allow your staff to develop their skills.

Tell me what you think…

 

8 Things She Hates About You

I saw this article today and thought I’d share it on the blog.  (Here’s the original article.)  These are 8 things that men do that annoy their significant others…

ANNOYANCE #1

You don’t pick up after yourself at our place.

Actually, we really don’t mind if you’re a little messy. An empty beer bottle here or dirty T-shirt there–no problem. But when we start seeing pieces of you (literally) all over the place, we tend to go off. Like when we find your hairs all over our bar of Dove, or toenail clippings on the nightstand, or a pile of chewed-out sunflower-seed shells on the counter. Please clean that up before we see it and want to gag. And then we’ll promise to be better about leaving globs of our hair in your shower drain. Do we have a deal?

ANNOYANCE #2

You ask how much our new haircut or handbag costs…

…yet conveniently don’t mention your sportsbook.com account or the $200 you lost on the NCAA parlay. Until we’re sharing a bank account with you, we’re not all that interested in your opinions on how we should or should not spend our money. And if we are sharing a bank account, here’s something you should know: Reminding us when we’re in the throes of post-retail bliss that we just blew all our disposable income for the month is not going to endear you to us. The perfect boyfriend response: “Wow, [fierce/sexy/hot] new [haircut/handbag/lingerie item]. I guess dinner is on me tonight!” Then wait a few days to bring up your financial concerns, by proposing we both start saving for something we want to buy together.

ANNOYANCE #3

You talk to us as if we’re one of the guys.

If you have any romantic inclinations toward us, please don’t call us by our last name. Otherwise we’ll assume we’ve already been relegated to buddy status and start thinking of you that way, too. Also, you’ll rarely find us holding entire conversations in  Simpsons and Old School quotes. Similarly, we don’t talk in numbers the same way men tend to. We’re happy to see evidence of your improvements at the gym, but we really don’t need to know how much you can bench-press. We also couldn’t care less about your day rate, the price of your car, or the number of beers you once shotgunned in college. And fantasy-league anything will make us flirt hard with the waiter. No, the conversation doesn’t have to be all about us, but we do want you to shoot for topics of mutual interest.

ANNOYANCE #4

You speak of the future vaguely.

Men seem to have perfected a special way of talking about the future that makes it unclear whether we’re a part of it or not. Or maybe you don’t know you’re doing this? For instance, you frequently mention your buddy’s wedding in another state 6 months from now and you haven’t asked us to go with you. Or you have a month long international business trip coming up but haven’t asked us whether we’d like to come for a weekend visit. If you picture us in your future, try talking about these things in such a way that we’ll stick around for it.

ANNOYANCE #5

You stop trying.

You have us as your wife or girlfriend. We’re committed to the situation, and all is good. But pretty soon you stop trying to impress us–and we don’t like that. “Now that we’re married, he never tries to ‘win me’ anymore,” says one friend. “If he wants to come on to me, he needs to ditch his gross dress socks and gym clothes and make an effort. Otherwise he ain’t getting any. Also, there is less foreplay and it’s more routine, which I hate. After 7 years, a man’s got to bust some new moves.” Or at least bring back a few of the retired ones that used to work. Like simply bringing home a pizza, a bottle of wine, and some flowers when we’ve had a bad day. Bring back the woo. We want the woo!

ANNOYANCE #6

You blatantly look at porn.

We don’t care that you masturbate, and we can’t change the fact that you might occasionally browse the fine and varied selection of naked ladies on the Internet. But if you’re looking at porn on a computer we also use, kindly delete your history. We don’t want amazonbabes.com to pop up every time we want to do some shopping or, worse, when your mother’s over and an underwearless young starlet showing her bald spot appears as we’re showing Mom something online.

ANNOYANCE #7

You turn down sex.

When it so happens that we’re the one who wants sex and you’re the one who doesn’t, we find your refusal to be confusing and irritating. Reassure us that we’re attractive and that you love us, but that you just aren’t in the mood. It helps to throw out a hint at what’s going on–that you’re tired, depressed, anxious at work, whatever, says Aline Zoldbrod, Ph.D., a Boston-area psychologist. That way we won’t obsess or be too pouty or aggressive. If we happen to be fresh off a girls’ night out liquored up and ready for sex, which you’re refusing, tread extra carefully. Horny can change to emotional, crying wreckage very quickly when your girl has a couple of glasses of Prosecco in her.

ANNOYANCE #8

You ask us out via text.

Texting is fast and easy and leads to sexy banter–but save it until after the first date. Calling a woman to ask her out is much more personal. It takes more effort (and balls), which is exactly what we find so sexy about your doing it. Okay, it’s an unfair burden for you, but it comes with an advantage: It makes you stand out from the mass of other men who text instead of calling. “So many people are conditioned to communicate through text messages that to receive a phone call or even an e-mail feels like a generously romantic gesture,” says Kristina Grish, author of The Joy of Text: Mating, Dating, and Techno-Relating. Another thing: Don’t include us in any mass texts you bang off to half the female names in your address book at 10 p.m., expecting one of us to come rushing out to meet you for the night. “Women know when your ‘plans 2nite?’ texts are generic, and when they’re intended to specifically address them,” Grish says. “You have so few characters to make a succinct point, but tuck an inside joke or reference into the message to make it personal, sexy, and fun.”

22,000 dead; 41,000 missing; 1 million homeless

A cyclone unleashed winds, floods and high tidal waves on the citizens of a densely populated region in Myanmar (in Asia).  The result, so far, is roughly 22,000 confirmed deaths, and more than 41,000 others missing.  (See  Article)

Here’s a note I just got from a friend of mine after he read an article about the devastation…

I’m blown away at the devastation, what if anything can we do as Christians?   What type of relief or agencies should we be aligning ourselves to? 

I’m just throwing these questions out to you, I know what should be done, but do we really take the necessary steps to see that it happens? Peace,

Now, I know that all of our readers aren’t Christians.  I don’t think we have to be.  The question, and challenge, still remain…What can we do as FELLOW HUMAN BEINGS to extend a helping hand to those in need?

Let’s come together and do something!

What’s On Your Mind?

As it relates to thinking, there seem to be two general categories of people: thinkers and non-thinkers.

Some people are constantly thinking.  It seems their minds are running a mile a minute.  They are planning, choosing, and reminiscing about anything and everything.  Then, there are the non-thinkers, those that come across as if  their minds only work if you put a token in it.  When you look at them or try to talk to them, you’re met with this cold, emply stare.

I fall into the first group.  I am constantly thinking–about anything and everything.  One of my goals is to do a better job of giving my mind a break.  Thinking too much (doing ANYTHING too much) is not good for you!

Here’s what I’m curious to find out…what do you spend most of your “thinking time” thinking about?

In other words, what occupies your thoughts most?  Are you thinking about current circumstances, memories of the past, future visions?  Are thinking about victory or defeat?  Problems or fantasies?  Friends, family or enemies? 

I once heard that, though we are physically limited by time and space, our minds are completely free to go wherever they desire to go.

Once again, what’s on your mind?

Why Keep Making Babies?

A femle friend of mine asked me a simple question today…

If a man clearly is not happy in a relationship, why does he keep making babies with the woman?

Unfortunately, we probably all know at least one couple whose relationship is rockier than the mountains.  Yet, every year, they seem to be having another kid to add to the collection.

I think the reason behind this has to do with the motivations of the two parties involved. 

Men will take what they can get.  Regardless of the uncertainty of the relationship, if she will still sleep with him, he’ll take it!  I don’t think he’s really thinking about the possibility of fathering another child…he’s just enjoying himself while he can.

Women, on the other hand, may use sex to try to keep him in the relationship.  If she thinks that the good lovin’ will keep him there (until they work out the other issues), then she will put herself at risk to having another child.  I would hate to think (and I know it happens) that a woman would get pregnant on purpose in order to keep connected to a man.  In my opinion, using a child to keep a man, is about as irresponsible as it gets!

What do you think?  Why do “couples” that can barely stand each other keep having babies together?

Above the Law: Sean Bell Killers Ruled Innocent

Hopefully, most of you are aware of the recent acquittal of the 3 police officers involved in the shooting…and death…of Sean Bell in New York City.  (see summary)

Charges against the officers ranged from manslaughter to reckless endangerment.  They were cleared on all charges.Sean Bell was unarmed.  Neither of the two people with him shot back at the plain-clothes detectives.

How is it that 3 officers can shoot 50 bullets at unarmed men and that not be criminal activity at some level?  I just don’t understand how that can be perceived–by anybody–as appropriate behaviour.

I’m curious to hear your thoughts on the situation.  Let me know…

Fuel for Positive Action

A little encouragement to start the weekend…

Fuel for positive action 
 
The way to deal with the negative energy of worry is to transform it into fuel for positive action.  Instead of being obsessed with what might happen, put your focus on what you are doing.  When worry is the only outlet for your concerns, those concerns will grow more and more troubling.

Not only does worry fail to address those concerns, it drains time and resources that could otherwise be put to productive use.  Focused, purposeful, effective action, on the other hand, points all your energy in a positive direction. And it soon creates a favorable momentum.

Because of that momentum, little annoyances and distractions that otherwise would have brought you down are transformed into compelling reasons to push forward. When you are focused on action, even the setbacks give you fuel for yet more action. 

When you sense a worry on the horizon of your thoughts, stop and 
consider this. What positive, productive thing can you do, right here and now, that will drain the power from that worry before it ever gets to you?
 
Get in the habit of seeing that every concern, every possible situation, provides fuel for positive action. Use that fuel to move yourself forward, and no longer will worry be an issue.
 
Ralph Marston

Financial Infidelity

I saw this article today and thought it was worth sharing…

One lawyer says that she sees more cases of financial infidelity–when one spouse overspends family money without the other’s knowledge–than sexual infidelity! (Please see article!)

Whether its a hobby, a compulsion, or even an addiction, there are more and more couples suffering from a breach of trust that occurs due to a loved one’s secret spending.

One study revealed that one third (1000) of nearly 3000 couples admitted hiding at least one purchase from their spouse.

Tell me what you think!

 

The Husband’s Bill of Rights

You knew it was coming.  After hearing the Wife’s Bill of Rights, it is only fair to discuss the other side.  Again, let me know what you think.

(written by Craig Playstead)

Preamble:

We, the husbands of America, do not claim to be perfect. We’re far from it. While we love being married to the wives of America, we have a few things that we’d like to straighten out. We’re not asking for the world here. We understand that things like following our college football team to every away game is out of the question, as are after-dinner cigars. However; there are a few minor things that we’d like to clear up to make our marriage a happy one.

Amendment I

We have the right to go out with our friends at least once a month.
A man’s relationship with his buddies is a bond that should never be broken. It helps keep us feeling young, connected and sane. It also helps us break the routine just like nights with the girls do for you. Even as we reach middle age, we like the fact that we still have a “crew.”

Amendment II

We reserve the right to dislike your friend’s husbands.
We promise to give the guy a fair shot, but when he starts acting like a moron, we can no longer authorize events with that family. And yes, wives have the same freedom to blackball when the tables are turned. It doesn’t mean we like your friend any less, it just means that in her haste to have a big, fancy wedding, she chose a jackass that we don’t want to spend our rare time off with. Listening to stories about how “wicked” he was on the French horn in his bitchin’ ‘80s band is just too much.

Amendment III

We have the right to have a few things of ours in the house.
Everything we hold near and dear to us shouldn’t all be in the garage. While we understand that our framed KISS concert poster might not make it on the living room wall, at least throw us a bone. The scene in “Juno” where Jason Bateman realized that everything he held near and dear was in a 200-square-foot room was a gut-shot to us all.

Amendment IV

We have the right not to be scolded by you.
We are your husbands, not your children. We don’t mean to track dirt onto the carpet or get chips on the couch, but it’s not like we just got a lap dance. Don’t treat us like your children and we’ll do our best not to act like them.

Amendment V

We have the right to teach our sons how to burp and fart.
Sharing bodily functions with our offspring is as much about life as it is about jokes. It’s also something that can help brings kids and dads together. Believe me, kids and guys always laugh at farts—that’s how we’re wired. And we’re not talking about being totally gross and inappropriate. We vow to teach them that there is a time and a place for behavior like this—and that the early service at Church is not one of them.

Amendment VI

We have the right to teach our children how to defend themselves.
Fighting is barbaric, terrible, and scary. But it’s also part of growing up. We want our kids to be able to get out of a bad situation, not be bullied, and be able to take care of themselves. One of the plus sides of learning how to take care of yourself is that the more you know, the less you have to use it. Teaching our offspring how to defend themselves in a scary world is one of the basic duties of a father.

Amendment VII

We have the right to as much reading material in the bathroom as we need.
Sometimes we’re in there a while, we can’t help it. And no, we’re not hiding … most of the time.

Amendment VIII

We have the right to watch the big game.
We care too much about our teams. We know it’s not rational, but it’s who we are. No one can explain the love men have for their teams, but you may as well embrace it because that love will not die. If you don’t believe this, just remember the Boston Red Sox had the most loyal fans in sports and didn’t win a World Series for 86 years.

Amendment IX

We have the right to the remote when we’re on the couch.
This is something that’s in our DNA. We know it, and you know it. If there’s any doubt, watch us surf at top speed while knowing if a show is worth watching after stopping on it for .2 seconds. It’s a thing of beauty.

Amendment X

We have the right to still use chivalry.
Yes … we know women are strong and independent, and we dig that. But allow us to open the door for you, or give up a seat and act like a gentleman once in a while. The world will be a better place because of it.