The Same Old Issues

In response to yesterday’s entry on Change, BCR made a comment:  once the newness of mere transactions wears off, a person is left with the same old issues.

It’s funny BCR raised that issue, because I’ve been wondering, “How long have I been dealing with the same old issues?”   

Regardless of how many “transactions” I make — or even if I make none at all — has any real “transformation” taken place?  Or am I still locked in?

Like AG suggested, until we are ready to undertake a disciplined and rigorous effort to re-program our deeply-rooted habits and mindsets, we may make superficial changes, but we soon have to confront THE SAME OLD ISSUES!

I’m currently engaged in a personal effort (more like a crusade) to get to the root of some of my long-standing issues.  I’m determined to make the necessary adjustments so that the issues of my youth are not the same issues I deal with for the rest of my life.  Quite honestly, if I must have issues, I’d like some new ones.

Discipline is Remembering What You Want

I originally published this post in July, 2006.  This thought keeps coming back to me, so I’d like to share it with the new readers.  Enjoy!

I heard this quote a few years ago and it continues to help me in my struggle for control of my life. In my efforts to be a self-disciplined person, I was looking for some wisdom on the subject, and this was just the thing I needed to hear.

External Control
As a college football player, our coaches imposed certain demands that each athlete had to adhere to. These demands, though, were for our benefit. They made us work out constantly. They made us get up and go to class. They made us maintain a proper weight. They were able to control our behavior because they controlled something we all wanted–playing time on game day.

We knew that if we failed to meet their demands of us, our coaches had the power to keep us from playing.

It is no accident that, this time period was the most structured and disciplined of my life. I was in great shape, doing well academically, and achieving athletically.

However, my discipline was not SELF-discipline, and I was essentially being controlled by someone else.

Game Over
I learned a whole lot about myself after my playing days ended. No longer having the external discipline to force me to do certain things, I found myself slipping back into some bad habits. I didn’t have the coaches around to make me do certain things. I kept eating as if I were still playing ball, but I wasn’t working out nearly as much as I was. Consequently, my “physique” underwent some adjustments, let’s say.

It was clear to me that even though I knew the benefits of a disciplined lifestyle, the external discipline that was imposed on me externally, had not automatically taken hold internally.

So, in order to be a disciplined person, would I have to always need someone else to control my activities? (I guess that’s why personal trainers, professional coaches, and “consultants” are making fortunes.)

I don’t think so.

The Key to My Control
When I think back to my playing days and investigate the reasons that I behaved as I did, the reason I complied with the external demands is because I really wanted to play. If playing wasn’t that important to me, I would have blown off workouts, skipped classes, etc. The reason I did A, B, and C, was simply because I really wanted D.

Now that I am in control of my behavior, I am getting better at identifying the D’s in my life. But not only do I identify the things I want, I’m learning that I have to keep them in the forefront of my consciousness. Like the quote states, discipline (doing the right things on a day-to-day basis) is a function of remembering (keeping in mind) the things I really want.

The reason I eat things I shouldn’t is because I forgot that I really want to be healthy and in great shape. The reason that I spent the money that I should have saved is because I forgot that I really want to be financially independent.

Very practically speaking, I’ve starting writing down what I really want in the two or three areas that I show the least self-discipline (typically my eating and spending habits). And when it is time to do those things (the moment of choice), I pull out my list of goals. I no longer have to be externally controlled, because I remember what it is that I really want.

Back in the Saddle

I know it’s been a while since I’ve written anything.  Things just got crazy the last couple weeks.  (I’ve got a few things up my sleeve…details to come soon.)

We’re already 3 weeks into the new year!  How are you doing with the resolutions and goals and changes you made in 2008?  Do you find yourself harboring some of yesteryear’s negative or limiting attitudes?  Have you reverted back to some of those old habits that keep you from getting anywhere? 

Have you fallen off the horse altogether?

Well, today’s message is, “Even if you’ve fallen, GET BACK UP!” 

In one particular area of my life, I’ve had some challenges.  Let’s just say that, since the Christmas and New Year’s holiday week, the After 7 club was more like the “Before AND After 7″ club.  I fell back into some bad eating habits.  I fell off the horse.

Nevertheless, I’m getting back up.  I am not done.  I am not giving up.  I can still make this work.  I’ve already started again and I feel good about it!

Just remember:  Winners aren’t the ones that never lose.  Winners are the ones that never quit!

On the Right Track

I’m on a mission!  I don’t just want to lose weight.  I want to be healthy.  And BEing healthy is a result of DOing healthy things.  Unfortunately, I have a number of unhealthy eating habits.  One such habit has been my tendency to eat big meals late at night.

Two weeks ago, I started the “After 7 Club“–a group of individuals committed to passing up those late night binges.  And honestly, I’ve been thrilled with the strength and discipline I’ve been able to demonstrate.  (I really believe a lot of it is a result of the accountability that comes from making a public commitment to something and having others join in on the effort.)

Well, something special happened on Saturday night.  I took my wife out on a dinner date to a Hibachi restaurant so there was another couple at our table.  Long story short…the gentleman seated near us, out of the nowhere, shared with us his testimony about how he lost 70 pounds.  His wife then began to tell us about how his snoring and sleep apnea impacted her sleeping, and consequently, their relationship.

He knew nothing about me, nor my efforts, before sharing that information.

I’m just amazed at the way God knows exactly when to send people and messages to let you know that you’re on the right track.

And here’s what I’m learning…those special “messengers” show up AFTER you’ve made a decision, and begun moving forward.